Jake Dunne

It happened the other day

I took the Blue Line to work
it stalled as it usually does
between Clark and Washington

To my left was your token homeless guy
smelling like chili and armpits
and muttering obscenities to himself

You never see any polite schizophrenics
“Please be quiet.” “I don’t want to talk about it.”

To my right someone had graffitied
“Jake Dunne sucks dick”
in the subway tunnel

I couldn’t be mad at them
for that person to take the time and extreme risk
of sneaking into the subway tunnel and strategically
writing that where every passerby stalled on the Blue Line
between Clark and Washington could read it
I figure Jake Dunne must in fact be
the dick suckinest of dick suckers
to ever walk the face of the earth

My day was your average museum workday
filled with ice cream sandwiches mice and ugly families

by the time the 4:40 Metra to Millennium Station
arrived to take me home I was beat

I got on and opted for the car to my left
since it was close to empty

The reason for this I quickly discovered
was because someone had either crapped their pants
or thrown a dirty diaper into the waste bin

the smell of feces instantly stung my nostrils

I still didn’t wanna deal with the crowd in the car to the right
so I sat as close to the back as possible in order to not be
at ground zero of the smell

On the ride back I looked out the window
and thought of Jake Dunne
somewhere out there right now
he was being the dick suckinest of dick suckers
to ever walk the face of the earth

I was proud of him

he was good at something

and if he reads this

or ever gets stalled
between Clark and Washington
and looks to the right

he’ll know

and it’ll be a dick suckin’ shitty day

for him too

© 2009 Lee Kitzis